Looking for change in all the wrong places

by | Jun 21, 2010 | Change | 0 comments

Do you often find yourself asking these questions?

  • Why do the same people, problems, situations and troubling feelings keep showing up in my life?
  • Why am I so unhappy (or anxious, depressed, angry)?
  • What’s wrong with me and why can’t I fix this?

Do you try to change, but nothing changes?

You may have discovered no matter how hard you try to change, feel better or eliminate painful feelings, you continue to struggle… while the happiness you seek seems somehow out of reach.

You’re not crazy!

First of all, you’re not crazy!  In fact, your strategy for fixing what’s wrong makes perfect sense. What’s more, you’ve probably validated this ‘fix-it” strategy countless times by using it successfully in the outside world… when something’s broke, you fit it! But applying the same strategy to your internal world of thoughts, feelings and sensations doesn’t produce the same results. This is because you are not broken, but rather, you are simply stuck in patterns that are no longer useful. You may have noticed that struggling to change, fix or eliminate what you think is wrong only seems to get you more of the same… more anxiety, more fear, more depression, more anger, more stress.

You may be asking the wrong questions

Perhaps, getting something different, begins by asking different questions. In fact, notice what happens when the above questions are framed differently:

  • How do “I” participate in having the same people, problems, situations and troubling feelings show up in my life?
  • What am “I” thinking, doing or saying right now to create unhappiness or happiness in my life?
  • What is different about me when things are going well?
  • What resources and skills do I have that WORK?

These new questions don’t ask why, but rather target HOW we create our reality. They ask us to pay attention to how we think, feel and act, in order to notice what’s not working as well as what’s working.

Welcome to ChangeWork Strategies, a new approach to working with unwanted thoughts, feelings and actions, WHILE tapping into “what’s right with you” and beginning to live your life with value, integrity, passion and a strong sense of the possible. For more details about the underlying principles and basic skill sets contained in this process, click here.

Welcome!  I invite you to read, comment, share opinions, and connect.

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